Quickthink

The first of a two part series about chatting with youngsters 

The other day I had the opportunity to sit down and chat with two groups of 10th graders here in Tartu. This was something that I had never done before, and I was a bit nervous about it.  There was no denying the gap between me and the kids I was about to meet. I was born in another place and I belong to another generation. What kind of dialogue could bridge the gap between us?

In one sense, I thought that perhaps the gap should not be closed at all. Just because I am older does not mean I am any smarter than the kids I would be talking with. I decided also that I should be cautious that I did not oversell my wisdom, or try to impose ideas from a position of supposed authority, especially if I could not be sure that my ideas would fit their experience.

So I threw overboard all topics relating to what I have done in my life. I wanted instead to talk about something I could share with people who had totally different life experiences so far. That meant talking about something that we are all trying to do now, whether we are kids or adults. What is that?

After pondering for a while, I settled on some standards. I wanted an idea that is important, but not limited to a single thing we do. The word “success” popped into my head. It is a word that I think about quite a bit. As a negotiation trainer, for example, I work with people to help them become more successful in negotiation. I also think about how I can be more successful as a trainer. I imagined that the teens had their own personal concerns with success too. Those concerns might be about school or other things they do, or about their friendships and family. But setting the context aside, we shared the same concern. I thought that this shared concern would help me bridge the gap.

I began to think more about how we define success, and how we judge ourselves. Can we learn how to succeed better?  It seemed to be something worth asking them.

In part two, I will describe what happened when we sat down to chat.

This entry was posted on Saturday, November 28th, 2009 at 6:44 am and is filed under Professional Training. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.